LET’S SIMPLIFY COMPLICATED RESPONSES
TOSS IDEAS – PROVOKASI (30 July 2017)
Sebagai salah satu peserta dari total 21 Speaker pada acara TOSS IDEAS yang diprakarsai oleh Komunitas Provokasi (Bp Prasetya M Brata dan Bp Prie GS), saya membawakan judul diatas. Semua speakers berbicara dalam bahasa Inggris pada acara itu.
Dibawah ini adalah script saya, untuk sharing saja……
Hi everyone…. May I begin with a question for you….?
Who do you think is the GREATEST TEACHER in the world? Einstein? Newton? Archimedes? None of them, I believe, Nature is. As we know, Scientists, have learned so many things from nature.
Just look at the WATER flowing downhill, it always tries to find easiest way.
What about human? DO THEY ALSO TRY to find easy, simple way? Unfortunately, it is not the case for many people. Not only don’t they try to find simple way, they even make simple things complicated.
WHY IS THAT?
- I think they are unaware on what is really going on and do not realize the effect of their response.
- Then they may look at the case in a NARROW VIEW. Therefore, they could not see the situation holistically and miss the opportunity to get better options.
The way it will close door for solutions but opened door for PROBLEMS to come.
Is there any way to prevent problem from happening? Yes, there is.
My suggestion is,
- Be FULL ALERT, be aware of what is really going on, anticipate the consequence of our response. Then
- WIDEN OUR VIEW, try to see things from VARIOUS ANGLES. This will give us NEW IDEAS and BETTER SOLUTIONS. This way we could manage ourselves to prevent problems from happening.
It’s very simple, isn’t it? At least very simple to talk about, which might be not that simple to do it in daily life.
Let me share with you a real and true story from my experience.
One day, it was very early quite morning……
Suddenly, my wife woke me up emotionally.
“My Dear, wake up, wake up! All’s gone!”
I woke up, (rubbing my eyes): “What’s gone?”
“All electronics in the living room is gone! Taken by a thief!”
“What…? I see! We will buy a new one later today”.
She was astounded hearing my response. She did not believe I responded that way. She expected me to be angry or sad as the electronics were bought on credit installment and it had not even been paid off yet! Poor me!
SHALL WE REVIEW THIS CASE?
Do you have any idea, HOW COULD I RESPOND THAT WAY spontaneously, even without thinking?
It’s VERY SIMPLE. I raised questions to myself: (SLIDE!)
” Do I want to make the situation COMPLICATED OR MAKE IT SIMPLE?”
Of course, I want to make it simple.
“Do I have CHOICES TO RESPOND?”
Yes, I have: to lose once or twice…..
What is the first loss? The electronics!
The second loss is the effect of the first loss: feel sad and frustrated.
So, I limited my loss to the electronics only. That’s it! I did not want the loss hurt my feeling. If I feel sad and angry, would I get the electronics back? Not a chance!
I just wonder, WHY many people often ALLOW THEMSELVES TO LOSE TWICE?
The answer is: they mixed up LOGICAL AND EMOTIONAL MATTERS unconsciously. Losing things is physical, logical. Being sad is emotional.
They allow the physical thing affect their emotion and they allow emotion dominate the control of their behavior!
WHAT IF I allow myself to lose twice and feel sad? I could carry bad mood with me for the whole day or even days. It could affect my work performance, my relationship with friends, my mind, body and soul. WHAT FOR?
If we could simplify our response, why make it complicated…?
Let me give you another example……
People tend to take revenge against the “enemy” whoever did something bad to them.
The famous saying about revenge is:” AN EYE FOR AN EYE”. If you take one of my eye, I will take at least one of yours! IMAGINE IFTHEY REALLY DO THIS! Terrible! We all will have no eyes.
We would not be able to see this slide. I would not be able to see your beautiful and handsome faces! And you would not be able to see this young, handsome man standing up here! If you agree, say: “Woooo….”. I know you will say: ” Look at the mirror!” (“Ngaca, dong!)
There would be no AMs, only PMs; no days, only nights; no lights only darkness. It reminds us to Simon & Garfunkel songs: “Hello darkness my old friend’s….” or Lionel Rochie’s “All-Night Long’s……All night……”
Worse revenge is” A LIFE FOR A LIFE”. “If you take my life, I will take…. ”Ups, wait a minute! How could I take your life when I am already dead? Don’t worry, somebody else will do it for me!
IMAGINE, IF THEY REALLY DO THIS! Disaster!
The earth will be empty, as everybody is dead. The Heaven will also be empty. Why? Because everybody goes to Hell for the sin of killing people.
That is the BAD IMPACT of revenge. ANGER has dominated their behavior! They allow their LOGIC REST IN PEACE!
When we take a revenge, we did TRIPLE MISTAKES:
- Punishing before trial. It is not clear yet, who is right, who is wrong., who is innocent, who is guilty.
- Judging without authority. You are not a judge. Even if you are, this is out of the court.
- Taking over God’s authority. How dare!
A simple response to this revenge issue is JUST LET GOD DECIDE whether or not to punish the “assumed” guilty people. What if God does not punish them? So be it! Just trust God! God has infinite justice. And God always has Plan B for them. (Possibly send them to the hottest fire in hell!)
So, rather than taking revenge, why don’t just simply forgive and forget……?
In most cases, there always be SIMPLER yet BETTER RESPONSES available for us to choose.
By SIMPLIFYING RESPONSE, we put ourselves IN CONTROL OF THE SITUATION, not being controlled by the outside factors.
Complicated response is like getting lost in the jungle. We’ll end up nowhere with full of confusions.
Simplified response is like getting involved in TOSS IDEAS. We’ll end up happily with full of solutions.
So, let’s simplify complicated responses for a BETTER AND HAPPIER LIFE!
Author To Think Without Thinking The MindWeb Way